Curahan Hati

You Are What You Draw

Lately, I want to write so many posts here because lot of things are mixed up in my mind. But I found it’s harder to say in definitely well written sentences whether to just imagine it all day long, think about it and find some great solutions to end all the problems perfectly without making any silly mistakes.

Well, it’s not just about problems and solutions, that I’ve been thinking about. When I was day dreaming, in all of sudden, I thought an ordinary stuff that I was focused in, could change the world into no ordinary world we used to live now. Then, in a blink of an eye, in the speed of the light, that idea is gone. I even couldn’t remember what I just did or what I was gonna do.

I like to draw. I like to drawing everything near me. I can draw them as similar as possible until you cannot know which one is the real stuff, and which one is only a picture.

These are the things that I like to draw most.

Human faces.

I like to draw human faces. And the face I want to draw is unintentionally describe what I’m feeling. For example, one incident (are you saying this, ‘incident’ literally huh?), in a frustating day, I called it frustating or you could also say it an irritating day because my English teacher lessen my test score from 88 became 78 because she caught me discussing with my friend who was asking me about something related from the test. I didn’t do that in my demand, it’s because my personality, I like to be kind to all my friends, so I explained it to him what was the meaning of it. I knew it was my fault. But I felt that my punishment wasn’t equal for what I did. I was upset. Then, I didn’t listen to her while she was teaching. When she made some jokes, and everybody in the class laughing, I didn’t laugh. From the start until the class is finished, I just kept drawing on my English text book. Even because she found that something strange was happened on me, and she asked me why I acted unusually, I just answered her without any smile drawn on my face. I was mean, I know. My deskmate frightened of me, or might be everyone in classroom felt the same as my deskmate were.

Back to the face drawing. In that time, I was very upset until my face become red (maybe, or I’m too lebay), I tried to decrease my anger by drawing something. I draw an evil, then I gave it short hair like Dora the Explorer wannabe, an irritating smile, and some details yeah. I didn’t realize what I was drawing, I just moved my pencil whereever I like, then it was done. The drawing done by my subconsciousness mind. My drawing looked familiar with someone I knew. Hell yeah, my friend said, “Hey, your drawing is like our English teacher! Why are you so mad at her? Hahaha that face is just as the same as she has ahahaha.”

It’s funny at first but not until she found it. Alhamdulillah, she never take look at it, it’s none of her business for looking at student’s doodle.

I like to draw lips.

My interest to draw lips is grown when I was in 5th grade. Four years later, many friends say that my lips is exotic, and it’s like mickey mouse’s head. In the past anyone never mentioned something odd or unique with my lips. Is it because what I draw is reflected to what I looked like or my feeling is? I like to draw banci or transvestite you call it in English, but I’m definitely not look alike one. Oh, of course it’s not about what I look like when it comes to banci, it’s about my interest which is reflected in it.

My conclusion is: “You are what you draw.”

It’s so magical, fellas.


P.S. For you who acknowledge about the use of grammar, please criticize and correct my grammar if some sentences in my post are wrong.